It's when England build a partnership that West Indies will be tested © PA Photos

I once mindlessly suggested to my father that it was a shame to see the Windies struggling. That was followed by him abusing me for a long time about how you shouldn’t feel sorry for them, as they happily beat up on everyone when they had that chance. His scars were still raw.

But that attitude seems to be disappearing in recent times. The Windies are fast becoming the second favourite team of cricket fans, especially to those who never saw them pummel their country’s batsmen inside their heads.

They’ve been a perfect second side of late. They have exciting young cricketers, mystery bowlers, mini Lara, a talented young quick, and they’re not likely to beat your team in a Test match.

Not that they don’t get close.

At home against India, they worked themselves into several good positions only to end up losing or drawing. And against Australia they played well only to fall apart when they needed to be at their best.

Yet again, they’ve snuck up on a better side and find themselves with a good chance of winning the Test. Rudi Webster, the former Windies psychologist, recently said they don’t know how to win. To beat England when they’re chasing less than 200 on a solid batting pitch at home, you need to really back yourself.

The two wickets were promising. But there is little to lose in a four over session that is essentially being played with Hammer Horror type lighting. It is when England puts on a partnership of any note or as they close in on the total that the Windies will be under real pressure.

Will they do everything they can to win this match, or will they just put in another effort that annoys the opposition before they eventually fold?

It’s nice to be everyone’s second favourite team, but it’s better to win a few matches. They may never be universally feared or hated again, but it would be nice if they could do more than just temporarily annoy fans, and on occasions like this, really ruin the mood of a few like my dad.

America gets to vote on whether they want to be run by a Mormon with a cricketer’s name or a guy some of their country is convinced is a socialist traitor in waiting. But if they get off work on stupid Tuesday they can waddle down to their local booth and vote based on how much they care about gay marriage. It’s democratic, when they count all the votes.

People even get to vote on Eurovision, even if occasionally they get beaten for voting against national interests.

Cricket is getting a new ICC chief executive soon as well. Haroon Lorgat is leaving; he’s tired of doing a job where everyone hates him and he can’t do much to change it. He left with a dainty air punch called Woolf.

So who decides who should be the new face of the ICC?

N Srinivasan, Giles Clarke, Julian Hunte and Sharad Pawar are four of the people looking for someone. Like most people, I see these guys as characters from an American prison drama.

Julian Hunte is the old guy who runs in the library. Sharad Pawar is the guy who runs the mostly ineffectual white-guy gang. Giles Clarke is the Latino big man. And N Srinivasan is the man in charge of the blacks, who make up 70% of the prison population.

That makes Haroon Lorgat essentially the head warden of a prison that is run by the inmates. To take control of this sort of environment you need to be an extremely smart guy who shakes things up and have the body odour of pure confidence. But in cricket's prison drama it's the most powerful inmates who vote on who the next warden is. So no one like that was going to get the job.

Continue reading "Cricket's new head warden"

How was the old-school John Wright ever going to mesh with the new-age John Buchanan? © Getty Images

A café near my place is shutting down. It’s called the Looney Tunes Café and it has decent food and nice staff. But the owner of the building has decided that he wants a bigger glossier café in its place and the current homely style of café is not going to match his new building.

Now watch me say that John Wright (the soon to be former coach of New Zealand) is the Looney Tunes Café and John Buchanan (current New Zealand director of cricket) is the forward thinking building owner trying to get the most out of his investment.

It’s easy to make John Buchanan out to be the bad guy. A non-Test playing bookish nerd who looks like Ned Flanders, who is overly fond of lawn bowls and ancient Chinese text. It doesn’t help that Shane Warne never misses a chance to abuse John Buchanan, or that several of Buchanan’s theories don’t really make much sense.

But New Zealand Cricket didn’t pick Buchanan by accident. They appointed the guy with the wacky theories to propel their mid-range side to greater things. New Zealand is not a country rich with cricket talent or facilities; they have always been at their best when their team comes together as one unit to knock over the better sides. Even with players like Brendon McCullum, Jesse Ryder, Daniel Vettori and Ross Taylor, they seem to rely on a team effort to win big games. And like the Oakland Athletics, they’ve only got so much to work with.

Continue reading "Wright and Buchanan: an imperfect pairing"

Mumbai fans wave flags like they are worried there is some IMG sniper on the roof who will take them down if they don’t show as much enthusiasm as possible © AFP/span>

I worked for a cult once.

It wasn’t as fun as I’d hoped.

It wasn’t some grey-alien-cloning-giant-clam style cult. It was a boring incestuous Christian fundamentalist cult.

It was rather disappointing. Even the incest sounded boring.

I’ve never found the IPL boring. I’m not anti-IPL, I just don’t care much.

I watch it in the background like I watch films with giant mutant sharks in them. I could never tell you too much about the overall plot. But there are some scenes I remember pretty well.

I’ve heard Lalit and the rest say the IPL is brilliant TV, and it is. For some it’s three hours of sport. For some it’s three hours of Bollywood sport. For me it’s three hours of background cricket.

So going there didn’t really fill me with excitement, it was just something I was heading to. Another cricket ground, another match. I’ve been to a few now.

I’ve seen cheerleaders. Fake horns aren’t new to me. Music has been blasted at me in many grounds. Crowds of overly excited simpletons are not new to me. I’m from Melbourne.

So what could going to the IPL at the Wankhede Stadium give me that I hadn’t seen before?

Outside there was little more than overexcited middle-class Mumbai teenagers with their faces painted and police everywhere. I assume they were middle class because the tickets are not cheap, and almost none of them had fake replica shirts like the Mumbai Indian (perhaps the singular usage was to make you feel like it was all about you) shirts we saw near our hotel.

Continue reading "The coolest, scariest IPL experience"

The first time I saw Matthew Wade, it wasn’t clear if he had as yet been allowed into a pub © Getty Images

The first time I saw Matthew Wade keep he was horrible. Truly disgustingly bad. It was like his gloves were ceramic tiles that had been attached just for the day. At the time I couldn’t work out why Victoria had been talking this kid up.

And kid was the right word, he looked seven.

Victoria’s wicketkeepers usually look like angry men who you’d see at the back of dodgy pubs playing cards. Men like Darren Berry or ‘Slug’ Jordon who could dismiss you with their gloves, chunky thighs or behind-the-wicket abuse.

At this point it wasn’t clear if Wade had as yet been allowed into a pub.

Wade’s batting was never in question. From the first time I saw Wade bat three things were blatantly obvious. For a tiny little seven-year-old, he could really murder the ball. He was a fighter. And he could really bat.

At this stage it hardly mattered. Wade was a young man trying to make his way. Brad Haddin was the national keeper. Luke Ronchi was back-up limited-overs keeper. Graham Manou was picked for the Ashes back-up slot before Tim Paine was Haddin’s unlucky back-up. Paine was better with the gloves than Wade, was a solid more reliable batsmen than Wade. With Chris Hartley around as well, Wade might have been as far back as fifth in line.

Continue reading "Wade's coming of age"

Ottis Gibson attempts to tell of an ordeal, but how far will he get before his lips are sealed? © Getty Images

Ottis Gibson wakes up and knows something is wrong.
It all feels different now.
He checks his wallet; it’s lighter than he thinks it should be, but it’s still there.
His phone is switched off, but it hasn’t been taken.
His clothes have been pressed and are hanging up in his stylish and comfortable modern-looking hotel room that has a view of the ocean.
All of his belongings are neatly stacked in the corner.
His computer is charging on the desk next to a complimentary fruit basket and two bottles of water.
Still he senses something is wrong.
His mobile phone won’t turn on.
The hotel room phone has no ring tone.
No matter how much he tries he cannot get the mobile Wifi code to work.
His door is locked shut, more than locked, it’s like there is a dead bolt from the outside.
The balcony of his room is at least 12 stories high, and it is far from any other balconies for him to jump to.
Ottis is trapped.
He picks up the folder with the hotel’s amenities list in it as a last ditch effort to escape or contact the outside world.
There is none.
As he closes the folder in a defeated way his hand runs over the raised lettering on the front. His hotel is called the International Continental Club.
In a dramatic and slightly over the top way his eyes put together the first letters of each word.
I
C
C

Continue reading "Ottis' twilight zone"

The organisation at the ground in Galle was so bad that many English and Sri Lankan fans just walked in © AFP

A cricket match starts at 5pm. Every one learns of this by word of mouth and the players are ready to play a match next to Galle fort. The game starts with XI players on each side, two umpires and a scorer. They use a tape ball, marking out the pitch by drawing lines and using someone’s sandals. If a ball is hit out of the ground, it’s replaced in less than two seconds. The umpire is strict with no balls and wides, maybe too strict. The batting team stands at point while the game goes on so that when a batsman is dismissed the next batsman will face within 30 seconds. It’s fast and hectic, there are no crowd sponsors nor media interest. It’s a high-quality amateur game played by cricket lovers.

I’ve only seen one of these games up close, but from this one game I’d say that the quality of cricket in Sri Lanka is high, and when people who love the game and have no agendas are running it, it can be administrated well.

Unfortunately at the top end of the game Sri Lankan cricket couldn’t be run much worse. Of late the Sri Lankan players have been thrown into two largely useless and forgettable tournaments, the tri-series in Australia and the Asia Cup. This is how they prepared for a Test series against the number one Test team. With no first-class warm ups and seemingly endless weeks of ODIs. But what is way worse is that they did some of this unpaid. It’s partly because of the US$20 million SLC lost (they also lost the disk auditing why they lost the $20 million) while hosting what the ICC describes as “the most successful world cup ever”. Or the fact the board is roughly $45 million in debt. It’s hard to see success when a small cricket board loses $20 million on what should have been a money-making event.

Continue reading "Sri Lanka trapped in a whole new ball game"