Anyone who thinks a cricketer’s life is easy and slow-paced should ask Mushtaq Ahmed. The former Pakistan leggie, currently a part of the England support staff, is now busy organising his wedding banquet – 18 years after he got married! Mushy, as he’s known, married Uzma Jabeen in December 1993 but was soon involved in a whirlwind of cricket, beginning with a home series against Zimbabwe. Four children later, it seems, they’ve finally decided, on the advice of family elders, to have the walima, an important part of Islamic wedding rituals. The kids will all be part of the ceremony, to be held in Lahore on Boxing Day, and so will a lot of team-mates who missed out on the feasting back then – including Imran Khan, Wasim Akram, Waqar Younis, Moin Khan and Inzamam-ul Haq. Better late than never, says Mushy. Perhaps the missus should demand a well justified second honeymoon too!

Those watching Australia’s pre-Test nets at the Bellerive Oval on Thursday could have been forgiven for think Waqar Younis was giving the Australian batsmen a workout. It was in fact umpire Aleem Dar, a dead ringer for former Pakistan fast bowler, who was sending down a few fast ones at Michael Clarke and David Warner. You could call it an unequal battle, given the fact that Dar is third umpire for the Test, and he was treated with due deference – Warner even curbing his instincts to pull the couple of bouncers he received.

Dar, officially the world’s best umpire, is more than a Sunday bowler. He bowled legspin in a 12-year first-class career in Pakistan and has a full-fledged Astroturf nets on the roof of his house. But bowling in the Australia nets is possibly tempting fate, the rate at which Aussie bowlers are getting crocked - there could be a strong temptation to pull in a Waqar lookalike and hope for the best.

Now that the man’s gone, the name may soon follow. The Punjab Olympic Association has asked the provincial chief minister to rename the Gaddafi Stadium in Lahore, in keeping with increasing public opinion against associating the historic venue with the former Libyan dictator. The ground was originally called Lahore Stadium but was renamed following Gaddafi’s visit to Pakistan in 1974. Now it’s time to change things back, says association secretary Idrees Haider Khawaja. “I don’t think his profile is inspirational enough to link with our cricket stadium’s identity,” Khawaja told ESPNcricinfo.

He’s yet to receive a response but he’s confident that a suitable name will be chosen. One of the options suggested is to name it after Abdur Rab Nishtar, a former governor of Punjab; the Gaddafi Stadium is actually situated in the Nishtar Park sports complex, along with hockey and football grounds. There could even be several cricketing options but for fans of the sport probably anything would be more auspicious than the current name.

Here’s a googly Pakistan cricket can do without: football is casting its eyes on the space all but abdicated by top-flight cricket in the country. Manchester United, the world’s largest football club, has signed a partnership deal with Zong, one of Pakistan’s largest mobile-phone companies, to supply exclusive content to its subscribers. It’s a deal similar to those Manchester United has in many countries but it’s the first time top-level football has moved towards what has always been seen as a cricket and hockey country.

"Ten years ago, the football market was small, the game was dying,” the Daily Telegraph quoted Rizwan Akhter, Zong's director of advertising and promotions, as saying. "But over the past few years, things have changed. Every other person, especially in urban areas, is associated with one club or another … Most of the cricket fans are football followers as well. And the primary reason for the increase in the popularity of football is the demise and turmoil in cricket."

The huge advantage, Akhter says, is that in Pakistan – as in neighbouring India – top European football is available on TV almost free. Maybe the Pakistan football team will have better luck with its keepers than the cricket team has of late.

The 2000th Test has attracted so much attention you’d be forgiven for thinking it was the biggest milestone to have occurred in the game. But for the 2000th to have occurred at Lord’s, a 1000th had to have happened. It took place at the Niaz Stadium in Hyderabad, Pakistan, a venue that now hosts wedding parties and serves as an occasional helipad. The 1000th Test, in which Pakistan beat New Zealand by seven wickets in 1984, remains the last one to have been played there.

"It's disappointing to see the condition of Niaz Stadium. With no international cricket in Pakistan and facilities unused, it had to happen," said former Pakistan spinner Iqbal Qasim, who played in the 1000th Test. "There's no comparison between Lord's and Hyderabad, even the players didn't know about the occasion and it is only now we know that ‘Oh, we were part of the 1000th Test.’"

Pakistan were unbeaten in 12 games at the Niaz Stadium. It was there that Javed Miandad and Mudassar Nazar shared a record partnership of 451 against India in January 1983. Miandad was left stranded on 280 when his captain Imran Khan declared and then proceeded to demolish India with 6 for 35.

The ground fell into disrepair later with no international match being played for more than ten years. The PCB regained possession of it in 2007 and it hosted a one-dayer against Zimbabwe in 2008 but matters seem to have gone downhill again for what should have been a celebrated venue.

Fast bowler Wahab Riaz and batsman Asad Shafiq could do with a second look at their contract with the PCB. The new contracts include a clause on ‘no social networking sites while on tour’ but the pair must have failed to notice it. "There was no fine or anything, they were just told to not tweet anything. There is a ban on social networking tools under the revised player code of conduct on tours so both were breaking it in a sense. But as they weren't tweeting cricket-related stuff it wasn't a big issue," a board official told ESPNcricinfo. "To avoid confusion about whether or not they can tweet non-cricket related stuff, they've simply been told to not tweet at all."

Riaz and Shafiq have got off with a reprimand this time, but a repeat of the offence could lead to fines and a possible suspension. The new contracts also regulate players’ interaction with the media and curfew hours on tour, and disallow the hiring of unapproved agents.

The probity of the recent one-day series between South Africa and Pakistan may have been called into question in the wake of Zulqarnain Haider’s flight to England, but at least the ICC has some good news to report from the series that took place just down the road from the governing body’s headquarters in Dubai. Mohammad Yousuf has been cleared of any wrongdoing after wearing a borrowed shirt for the series decider.

According to an ICC press release, Yousuf was found not guilty of a violation of “clause 2.1.1 of the ICC Code of Conduct for Players, as read with Section C6 of the Clothing and Equipment Rules and Regulations which deal with appropriate and professional standards of appearance on the field on play.” His alleged crime? Writing his name on the back of the shirt with a marker pen.

In a glorious triumph for common sense, Yousuf – who had pleaded not guilty to the offence – was exonerated by the match referee, Andy Pycroft, on the not-unreasonable grounds that he had only just arrived in the country for next week’s Test series and therefore hadn’t been scheduled to play in the one-dayers.

“In making my decision, I took into account that Yousuf was required by the management representing the Pakistan Cricket Board (PCB) to wear the offending shirt as he had arrived in Dubai for the Test series and not for the ODIs,” said Pycroft. “As such, he didn’t bring with him any coloured clothing. The matter should now be referred by the ICC to the PCB pursuant to the relevant section of the Clothing and Equipment Rules and Regulations.”

The reasoning was faultless, but the timing, on the day that match-fixing once again became the hottest topic in the world game, was unfortunate. Surely the ICC has more important issues with which to contend?

The prospect of making your debut for one’s country can be thrilling enough, but what could possibly add more excitement to it? Definitely, a helping hand from a legend of the game. Pakistan’s rookie batsman Umar Amin is looking forward to making a successful debut for his country in the upcoming Asia Cup and he plans to do it by playing with a bat that belonged to none other than Sachin Tendulkar.

The bat was gifted to Amin, who plays for Rawalpindi, by Shoaib Akhtar after Amin played well in a domestic game last year. “I got the bat for scoring a match-winning innings in a domestic game and I still have it with me," said Amin. “It is a treasured possession for me. I intend to make my debut for Pakistan with that bat.” The 20-year old Amin has been a prolific scorer for Pakistan at the domestic level and has also enjoyed success with the Pakistan U-19 and A teams.

Shoaib Malik is reportedly engaged to marry Hyderabad-based Indian tennis sensation Sania Mirza, and the pair is set to tie the knot in April. This has been confirmed by the Pakistani allrounder on his twitter feed, and by Imran Mirza, father of the bride. Shoaib had earlier hinted that he was on the verge of getting married. “I desire to get married soon. You will soon get some good news but it depends on my family. No one can say what will happen, but it will take place with the concurrence of my family,” Shoaib had said. The new development comes barely 20 days after Malik was handed a one-year ban by the PCB in the aftermath of Pakistan’s disastrous tour of Australia. Sania, like her fiancé, has gone through a tough time recently, with a failed engagement to businessman Sohrab Mirza which was called off in January, and a floundering tennis career. This one is truly a match fixed in heaven.

The scourge of Pakistan's cricketers, a self-styled moral crusader and head of the national assembly's standing committee on sports Jamshed Dasti has been forced to resign from his seat...after allegations that his MA degree in Islamic Studies was fake.

Dasti stepped down after being given little option by a six-judge bench of the Supreme Court who were looking into the case filed against his certificate in religious education. Geo News reported that Dasti could not answer a volley of basic questions about Islam or even his education hurled at him by the judges. The judges ultimately gave him the option to either be sacked or step down himself and he chose the latter.

The news - and the nature of it - is sure to bring a smile to the faces of many in the cricket establishment, including PCB officials and players such as Younis Khan. Dasti shot to a dubious infamy after he alleged, in the aftermath of Pakistan's semi-final loss in the Champions Trophy, that the side had fixed matches. He summoned Younis to a hearing in the national assembly, where Younis resigned in protest at the treatment. Dasti was widely lambasted for having instigated the chain of events.

Undeterred by the criticism, he continued his campaign to sort out the PCB, regularly calling top officials including chairman Ijaz Butt to hearings and grilling them over any number of issues, from board finances, to selection, to results on the field. With uncertainty over whether he is allowed to stand for elections again, it is unlikely he will be meddling in the country's cricket affairs anytime soon.

Nothing ceases to amaze in Pakistan cricket. In less than a fortnight you could go from being branded a bad influence to being rewarded for your performance by none other than the President himself.

On March 10 the PCB - the President of Pakistan is its patron - banned Younis Khan (and Mohammad Yousuf) from playing for Pakistan in any format for an indefinite period because his infighting - according to the PCB - brought down the morale of the team and resulted in the side's disastrous, winless tour of Australia. Shahid Afridi, of ball-biting infamy, was punished by the PCB for that very incident during the Perth ODI, where he was captain, with a fine of Rupees 3 million. On Tuesday, both Younis and Afridi were awarded the President's Pride of Performance Award. Seriously. Both were nominated for this award a few months ago and their names were recommended to the President. Talk about changing perceptions.

He’s been in the news for all the wrong reasons lately, but not this time. Shahid Afridi – brutal batter, canny legspinner, pitch pirouetter, ball biter - has been appointed Pakistan’s national ambassador for the environment. Seriously. He will promote this noble cause and raise awareness among the public, Pakistan’s federal minister for environment announced. The minister believed Afridi would be ideal to convey the “soft” image of Pakistan and thereby spread the message of conservation at the national and global level.

Funds shortages in Pakistan’s cricketing establishment have affected people in different ways, even during the final of the showpiece domestic tournament, the Quaid-e-Azam Trophy. The Times of India reports that mineral water is off the menu for the players during the five-day game in Karachi; they will instead have to make do with filtered water. That has apparently alarmed Younis Khan, the former Pakistan captain, who is recovering from a stomach bug – he brought along his own water. Similarly discomfited are the match scorers, the custodians of cricket’s most important facts and figures. They have reportedly been denied scoring books by the administrators and are expected to purchase their own stationery.

What’s the best way to get back into your national side if the selectors overlook you? Become a coach. That seems to be the route former Pakistan captain Younis Khan has taken. Passed over for Pakistan’s upcoming tour of Australia, Younis, who is currently on a self-imposed break from cricket, made a surprise appearance at a coaching camp in Lahore on Tuesday. He refused to speak to the media after he completed his course but a “friend” quoted by AFP was more revealing. “Younis wants to get more educated in the game and this doesn't mean he will start coaching,” the friend said. “Younis will be back in international cricket after completing the well-deserved rest.”

But Younis’ commitment to returning to international cricket has been questioned after he failed to appear in domestic games. He was unreachable after the PCB appointed Mohammed Yousuf as his replacement on the Australian tour and had reportedly gone fishing according to the local media. Looks like the hunt for greener pastures is definitely on.

	Flab-ulous: Shoaib Akhtar © Associated Press

Just as his chances of making the national team were getting slimmer, Pakistan fast bowler Shoaib Akhtar has undergone liposuction to remove excess fat from his body. The 34-year-old has not played a Test in more than two years, and the latest move is part of his efforts to end the fitness troubles and injury woes that have severely hampered his career.

"After the liposuction to trim down his weight, Shoaib will require at least three to four months to make a complete recovery and be available to play competitive cricket once again," Dr Waqar Ahmed, a sports medicine specialist, told Pakistan daily Dawn.

After the surgery Shoaib is going to be lighter in the pocket as well, since the PCB refused to foot his burgeoning medical bills. "He is a centrally contracted player and he is supposed to consult our medical panel and inform us before undergoing any medical treatment but he didn't do this before opting for the liposuction," a PCB official said.

	Pakistan players play football during training © AFP

He may have chosen cricket as a career but Pakistan captain Younis Khan is lending his weight to other sports too. Ahead of his team's tour of England next summer, he will be in South Africa for the 2010 football World Cup as Pakistan’s ambassador. Faisal Saleh Hayat, president of the Pakistan Football Federation (PFF), said Younis’ interest in football would help raise the game’s profile in a cricket-obsessed country. “We would love to take him with us to South Africa,” Hayat said. “He will be representing Pakistan there and we look forward to it.”

Younis had invited Pakistan’s football coach, George Kottan, to a cricket camp ahead of the Champions Trophy and said Kottan was impressed with the quality of football at the camp - four or five cricketers were, he said, excellent football players. “I believe that football is a true global sport. Almost every kid plays it no matter where he lives,” Younis said. He also wants his son to take up squash - where Pakistan has a more celebrated history - and not cricket as a career. "We have won so many laurels in squash in the past and it's a pity that we are no more the champions,” Younis told Geo TV. “I would ask my countrymen to encourage their children to take up games like squash, hockey and football. As for myself, I would love to see my son become a world squash champion.”

Naming streets after cricketers seems to be the latest way of recognising their achievements. Four months after Shivnarine Chanderpaul Drive, comes Umar Gul road. To acknowledge Gul's brilliant performance in the World Twenty20, the North West Frontier Province (NWFP) ministry for sports, culture and tourism in Pakistan has inaugurated a road in his name.The inauguration ceremony was held at the Peshawar Cantonment, in his hometown on Tuesday, and was attended by many, including Gul's family members. No word yet though on the speed limits...

When Shahid Afridi walked out to bat for the first time in a one-day international, against Sri Lanka in Nairobi in 1996, the bat in his hands once belonged to someone who had played many memorable innings, and several of them against Pakistan. It had belonged to Sachin Tendulkar and found its way to Afridi via Waqar Younis, who said “it could prove lucky as it belonged to a great player”. It was lucky indeed for Afridi reeled off the fastest ODI century off 37 balls, a record that still stands.

“Waqar gave me the bat in Nairobi where I made my debut for Pakistan. He told me Tendulkar had given him the bat and asked him to make similar model bats from Sialkot,” Afridi told PTI. “That record [fastest hundred] still stands today and makes me proud. I also got other good scores with this particular bat so it is very valuable for me and I have no intention to auction it off to anyone.”

Mohammad Zahid and Aamer Nazir. When they appeared on the scene for Pakistan in the 1990s, it sent everyone scurrying to find out their antecedents. Not much was discovered about either of them, except that they impressed Wasim Akram despite not much first-class experience.

Now, like a bolt from the the blue, comes the spotting of a 7'2" fast bowler from Multan who has former Pakistan fast bowler Aaqib Javed excited. At 6'8", Joel Garner and Bruce Reid were the tallest fast bowlers to play international cricket, but Mohammad Irfan is reportedly something else.

"I spent the whole day thinking to myself that we might have something really special here," Aaqib told PakPassion.com. "At the moment he has no clue about what he's trying to do, but we can teach him that stuff at the [Pakistan] academy."

Irfan, 21, has apparently never even played a proper game of cricket. Aaqib wants Irfan to "pack his bags and come straight back" because he is keen to get cracking on improving Irfan's mental and physical fitness. It may take some serious work, too. For someone that tall, even landing a ball on a length could turn out to be a bouncer to the man down the other end of the pitch.

Zahid and Nazir faded away but this one, he could be something big. If Irfan plays international cricket, the headline writers could have a field day - "His Highness" ... "Mount Irfan" ... Much fun.

Even Javed Miandad’s most enthusiastic supporters would struggle to pretend that diplomacy is one of his strengths. Nevertheless, the nation’s favourite pugilist will shortly be given the chance to practice his dialogue with a global superpower, when he heads to China as a cricket ambassador, at the behest of the Pakistan Sports Ministry.

The fall-out from Javed’s latest acrimonious split with the Pakistan Cricket Board has barely settled – he squared up to the board chairman, Ijaz Butt, at a senate hearing earlier this week, following his abrupt resignation as director-general in January, after only a month in the role. But none of that matters to the sports secretary, Ashraf Khan, who regards Javed as the perfect man to take cricket across the Karakorum Highway.

“It will be an exploratory tour for Miandad which runs between March 9 and 15," Khan told reporters. "China did very well in the last Olympics and you can't underestimate their talent in any sport. We do hope that Miandad will assist them in improving their cricketing skills."

Miandad’s appointment was rubber-stamped by the Pakistan president, Asif Ali Zardari, who is also the patron-in-chief of the PCB. "I have no doubt that they could excel in the field of cricket,” said Miandad, “like they did in other sports.”

It could be the global financial crunch, or just plain ol' fashioned occupation of the higher ground but having come across multi-million dollar/rupee defamation cases, Shafqat Naghmi's decision to sue PCB chairman Ijaz Butt for damages worth one Pakistan rupee (approximately US$0.012581) is worth nothing. Naghmi, a former chief operating officer of the board, is taking Butt and other officials to court for levelling charges of financial mismanagement against him.

Turns out, it is neither morality or recession. “I will claim a public apology from them and one rupee in damages to show these people what I think they are worth,” Naghmi told the News, which is, in the world of Pakistan cricket, a pretty sharp insult. “This board does not deserve to remain in power. They don’t know what they are doing. The defamation suit is meant to expose them before the public,” Naghmi said.

Given the unusual nature of the case, Naghmi's one buck could well be a million dollars for memorabilia addicts.