Paul Collingwood admires his massive equipment © Getty Images

Cricket bats have become bigger and bigger in recent years to the extent that they are like railway sleepers. However, Paul Collingwood has taken it to the extreme by using one that really wouldn't look out of place on the West Coast Mainline.

He has been using the extra-large bat, which weighs around four-and-a-half to five pounds compared to the normal weight of just under three pounds, during nets on the South Africa tour.

"It's something the Durham second-team coach Jon Lewis came up with about six months ago,” he said. "He asked the manufacturer to make him the biggest bat possible, just to see if someone could use it in Twenty20.

"I tried it in the nets as a bit of a laugh. The weight of it makes you bring the bat down very straight and play the ball as late as possible.”

The by-product of using such a heavy piece of wood is that when Collingwood returns to his normal weight bat it feels as though he is batting with a toothpick. "When you go back to your normal bat, your bat-speed is exceptional because you can't even feel a cricket bat in your hand,” he said.

However, regardless of size of Collingwood’s bat, plenty of balls having been hitting the middle in recent weeks after he made 40 from 188 deliveries to help England save the Newlands Test. There is only one problem about the extra piece of kit he is now lugging around in his bag.

"I've found it of benefit to me,” he said. “It might not work for everybody - and Phil Neale, our manager, isn't very happy with the excess baggage.”

Covering cricket is certainly not a hardship and this tour has been especially enjoyable to follow. However, there are still moments that leave you cursing. Such as when you can’t find any internet access just as you have two pieces to file.

The final day of a Test is often hectic because all the issues from the game are wrapped up, but at Newlands it was extra busy courtesy of England’s latest great escape. Does Graham Onions know how much extra work he creates?

With two stories written and filed I decided to finish the day’s work back at the hotel rather than sit on my lonesome in the Cape Town press box. That idea was fine, it had worked on previous days, so I packed up and headed back to my room which was only a 10-minute walk from the ground.

Got there, unpacked the laptop and turned it on. Searched for the wireless – there it was, not very powerful but usable – and went to connect. Then the fun started. I paid for the connection period I needed and got my log-in number only for the server to tell me it couldn’t register me. Maybe I’d put the number in wrong? Tried again, nope. OK, this wasn’t looking good.

I tried two more times. Still nothing, so I got on the phone to the help desk. “Yes sir,” said the helpful man, “we have a problem with some hardware and the servers are down. They might not be up until the morning.”

Wonderful, surely they could have said that on the website before I paid for access. But saved the rant for later. Still had to file. Remembered the hotel had one internet kiosk on the first floor so saved my pieces onto a flash drive and high-tailed it down there. It was free, phew.

Then realised that the voucher I’d bought for wireless access wouldn't work in the kiosk. Had to pay again, but at least it worked. Surely I was home free? Of course I wasn’t. Went to open my email account and a screen flashed up: “Access restricted due to unsuitable content." It had clearly read my work. Tried again, but this computer was having none of it. Fortunately I have a few email addresses and the machine allow me into another account.

Meanwhile someone else popped their head in to see if the machine was free. “Ten minutes,” I said. Wishful thinking.

Grabbed the saved documents and pasted them into the email. All I had to do now was click send and it should be sorted. “Server not found.” You must be kidding me. The clock telling me how much time I had left read five minutes. I was on the verge of dictating this stuff over the phone which, from experiences in West Indies, can be a painful exercise for those on both ends of the conversation.

At times like this violence is often an option. Give the computer a kick, slam the keyboard down and resort to foul language. But the computer wasn’t mine and I was in a public place. I calmly (honest) opened another email, pasted the text in and crossed both fingers and toes.

Send. Wait. The ‘loading bar’ at the bottom of the screen gets a third full, then half, before finally a moment to savour. “Your email has been successfully sent.” Hurray. The timer said two and a half minutes. Just enough time to check the pieces had been received in London. They had. Job done.

Was all the running around worth it? I guess that’s for everyone else to decide.

	Stuart Broad's antics didn't impress the South Africans © Getty Images

There’s nothing like a good controversy to spice things up. There hadn’t really been too much to get the match referee interested in this series except for Stuart Broad’s "inquiry" about the amount of time South Africa took to review his lbw decision in Centurion.

That all changed on the third day at Newlands – and Broad was again the centre of attention. A fancy piece of footwork was caught on camera as Broad stopped the ball then stepped on it with his size 12s. It soon became clear the issue was escalating and by the close South Africa had “raised concerns" about the state of the ball. That was enough to evoke the spectre of ball-tampering.

The South African media immediately latched on. “Ball tampering furore,” was the front page Cape Times headline, which didn’t leave much to the imagination. On the IOL website there was a blown-up screen shot from E.tv, the news channel, which showed a large foot about to go down onto the ball.

The UK papers also went big with the story. “England ball-tampering bust-up!” screamed the Sun, while another red-top, the Mirror, said “Stuart Broad's balls up spikes England.”

After making their issues known to the match referee, South Africa had until the start of play today to make their complaint official. The clock was ticking as play grew nearer (well, it wasn’t quite that tense), till shortly after 10am the South Africa spokesman confirmed they wouldn’t take it any further.

A couple of hours later the ICC issued its own release, saying it “now considers this specific matter to be closed”, So, almost as quickly as the controversy erupted it fizzled away. Or did it?

The problem with the accusations that South Africa made, and they were pretty serious, is that you can’t suddenly back-track on them. Did they really think England had done something wrong or not? If so, take the complaint all the way.

There’s only one Test remaining in the series, but it’s shaping as a decider. Recent events mean we could be in for a tense finish to this contest.

	Table Mountain shadows Newlands with often stunning effect © Getty Images

There are few better settings for a cricket ground than Newlands. It doesn’t matter how many times you come here (and sorry if you've read similar entries before), the backdrop of Table Mountain and the surrounding scenery still takes the breath away. Lord’s is a special ground because of its history and grandeur and the MCG is inspiring due to its sheer size, but Newlands matches them as one of the finest grounds in the world.

The evening before the third Test the media were generously entertained by the Western Province CEO Andre Odendaal for ‘sundowner’ drinks on the boundary edge. Down at ground level you really get an idea of the impact the mountain has over the ground and as the sun began to set it created a wonderful glow across the stadium.

Other than the gathering of journalists on the boundary (I wonder what a collective noun for a group of journos should be?) the ground was almost deserted with preparations complete for the next day’s Test. However, one other person very much still there was the security guard who kept a beady eye on those who dared encroach on the playing area.

That was understandable, he was only doing his job, but it was mildly amusing when he signalled in no uncertain terms that the club’s CEO that he wasn’t allowed on his own outfield. Seniority, though, didn’t matter and anyone who put a foot over the boundary rope was given a swift ticking off.

***

Perhaps it was Newlands’ stunning location that prompted a couple to get married on the opening day of the Test. Before play there was a ceremony on the outfield complete with an archway of roses, although the wedding did take place in front of the Snake Pit – one of the grass banks and popular bar areas on the ground. Perhaps that's where they’ll be having their honeymoon?

***

Yesterday was carnival time in Cape Town with the annual Kaapse Klopse, a minstrel festival that packs the streets of the city centre that gets its routes from the slavery movement. More than 10,000 people parade through the city bowl area, many with darkened faces, dressed in an array of wild clothing. The musical instruments create an air similar to the Notting Hill Carnival in London and it certainly brings the city alive.

It is still known as the Coon Carnival among local Capetonians, but Cape Town authorities have renamed the event the Minstrel Carnival because of concerns by visitors of the derogatory connotations of ‘coon’. However, these are not shared by many in the city and most of the people I spoke to still use the original name.

	Scoreboard pressure © Cricinfo Ltd

Well, not many people expected that. South Africa routed by an innings and plenty. It’s not often England fans have been able to finish a year with such a celebration, and it won’t be surprising if some haven’t quite sobered up by the time the Newlands Test begins. There’s a New Year party to be had in Cape Town.

This job means I need to be a neutral observer of cricket but yesterday, and especially the fourth afternoon, will go down as something pretty memorable. England don’t win many Tests overseas – in fact, this was only their fourth since beating South Africa in Johannesburg in 2005. They've come a long way since Kingston and their demise for 51.

England’s success (and South Africa’s failure) was still being digested as the roadshow moved west to Cape Town – the highlight of any trip to these shores. Visiting fans had logged on to online copies of the papers from back home, while South Africans pored over their own media’s reaction to the innings defeat.

On my way to the airport a couple of people said, “South Africa got what they deserved”, and there is a growing feeling of unease around the performance of the team. This is a mighty proud sporting nation and defeat doesn’t sit well, especially after the side had promised so much. The next few weeks promise to be fascinating.

The completion of the Durban Test marked the end of international cricket for 2009 (don’t worry, you’ve only got to wait until Sunday for it to start again) and Cricinfo is currently taking an extensive look back at the last 12 months. I don’t want to go over old ground, but suffice to say it’s been quite a year (and quite a decade).

And as it’s that time of year, here are some personal wishes for 2010.

• Test match pitches stop getting flatter.
• Players don’t moan about workload and then mention the IPL.
• Andrew Flintoff's return from injury isn’t made headline news (Look, England can win in all formats without him).
• Shane Warne creates an academy to nurture future legspinners.
• Next winter’s Ashes series proves a classic contest (Sorry to mention the ‘A’ word, but at least it’s an objective view).

Happy New Year everyone.

	Football is hugely popular with the England team, just so long as nobody gets hurt © Cricinfo Ltd

“Which team do you support?”

It’s one of the questions I’ve been asked most frequently in South Africa and it’s rarely asking about the cricket. Wherever you go people want to talk about football, and it isn’t only because the World Cup is quickly approaching.

The English Premiership has a huge following out here - and not just because of the Barmy Army. It helps that there are more TV sports channels than you can throw a stick at – seven at the last count from Supersport alone - which means almost every game is shown on the box. Because of the restrictions placed on broadcasting Saturday afternoon games back in the UK it’s actually possible to watch more games in South Africa.

As in India where there is cricket on a channel somewhere 24 hours a day, the same can be said for Premiership football in South Africa. Whether it is a live game, highlights, analysis, a phone-in show or a classic match from years gone by there is barely a minute without some football (or soccer) to watch.

“What would we do without the greatest league in the world?” said the anchor of last night’s football coverage. Well, there would certainly be a lot of free time on the TV channels.

Manchester United, as should be expected from a club that has more overseas supporters than home-based fans, has a huge following in this country. Hardly a day goes by when you don’t see a kid in replica kit, while Arsenal, Chelsea and Liverpool also have a healthy fan base. During the first Test at Centurion the PA announcer read out the scores during the fourth day’s play. That doesn’t even happen back home.

From previous experiences in South Africa I know how much of a social activity following the football is. There’s a group in Cape Town, largely consisting of Chelsea fans, who religiously meet down by the Waterfront to watch the matches in one of the local bars. Some are expats who want a taste of life back home, but there are always a fair few locals in the audience.

Football is also a huge favourite of the South Africa and England teams. The home side often have a kick-about before play with some of players possessing very handy skills. However, the visitors have had to ban in from their warm-ups after a series of injuries sustained during the matches played at practice.

Joe Denly’s knee injury before the one-day series against Australia earlier this year, when he was tackled by Owais Shah, was the final straw, but Jimmy Anderson’s participation in a Test in Wellington in 2008 was nearly ended by a football mishap where he rolled his ankle. Time to put the football away, lads.

They’ll just have to make do with watching it on TV.

	A picture in the Durban pavilion shows the final scoreboard from the last timeless Test © Cricinfo Ltd

With the bad-light issues that often plague Durban Tests it’s tempting to suggest a few more days would be useful to engineer a result. But 70 years ago there was an occasion when even 10 days wasn’t enough.

Kingsmead is famous for having hosted the last timeless Test, where South Africa faced England from March 3 to 14 in 1939. There was play on nine days, there were two rest days, and one was washed out before further rain ended played at tea on the 10th day with England 42 short of an unthinkable pursuit of 696. At that point the tourists had to say enough was enough as they had a boat to catch in Cape Town – a 1000-mile train journey away – and the two captains, Wally Hammond of England and Alan Melville of South Africa, agreed to a draw. All that effort and still no result.

Among the many pictures that cover the walls of the main stand at Kingsmead there a few commemorating that game, including the famous image of the scoreboard showing England’s final score of 654 for 5. Spare a thought for the bowlers, too. Hedley Verity sent down 95 overs (766 balls) and Norman Gordon, the one survivor from the match, bowled 92 in the game.

“Unparalleled in the history of the game this was in many ways an extraordinary match,” Wisden said, “emphasising that there are no limits to the possibilities of what may occur in cricket; but it ended farcically, for insufficient time remained to finish the timeless Test.”

South Africa batted first on winning the toss and piled up 530 with hundreds from Pieter van der Bijl and Dudley Nourse. The innings lasted a mammoth 202.6 overs – and they were eight-ball overs, which proved how much of a grind it was. Test cricket is a game of patience, but this was pushing it to extremes.

England struggled in reply and could only muster 316 before South Africa, with time clearly not meant to be an issue, added 481 in their second innings (Melville scored 103). It left England 696 to chase down when they began on March 9, the sixth day of the game. Five days later they were still going.

“Instead of going in with their tails down, the batsmen set about their task in a magnificent manner and proved what can be done when the wicket remains unimpaired,” Wisden said.

Bill Edrich was the leading light with 219, which kickstarted his Test career after he hadn’t passed 28 in his first 11 innings, while Hammond and Paul Gibb also struck hundreds. In the end, though, it all came to nothing as England had to catch their boat. And to think that nowadays there’s Twenty20 which is completed in three hours. What would Lalit Modi have made of the timeless Test?

A belated Merry Christmas from Durban. I hope those back home enjoyed their turkey and stuffing. It was steak from the braai out here.

Both teams trained on Christmas Day but it’s fair to say there wasn't an outpouring of festive spirit. There was only the one Santa hat on view as Graeme Smith got into the act, but with England it looked like any other training session. Cricket, it seems, is a serious business whatever the time of year. Stories have been doing the rounds of what it used to be like on tour at Christmas before players and media became much more segregated. Nowadays it’s very much them and us.

However, Boxing Day Tests are a special occasion whether held in Melbourne, where Australia are facing Pakistan, or here at Kingsmead. It's a focal point in the calendar and for South Africa it's their first at home in two years after being down under last Christmas.

But's it's probably more of an event for the travelling fans. Durban has been steadily filling up with England supporters in recent days and they all made a bee-line for the grass banks. Santa hats and tinsel were in good supply, but sunscreen and sunglasses were equally important.

Fans crammed into Castle Corner like sardines and the area was full well before the start of play. The queues at the bar quickly grew longer – it’s a day for keeping well hydrated, although the sponsor’s variety of drink is unlikely to have the same restorative qualities as the energy ones downed by the players at regular intervals.

There isn’t much shade the spectators, either – umbrellas are always useful in these parts, as for protection for the sun and the rain – so good luck to the man who was dressed on the full Father Christmas outfit. It was a surprise to see him really, you’d have thought he’d want a few quiet days after dropping off all those presents.

	Happy homecoming: Kevin Pietersen is back where it all began © Getty Images

It’s 10 years ago that Kevin Pietersen’s life changed forever. When England were touring in 1999-2000, Pietersen lined up against Nasser Hussain’s team for KwaZulu-Natal. He scored 61 at No. 9 and took 4 for 141 with his offspin. He also began enquiring about opportunities in county cricket and soon set off for a new home.

Pietersen is trying to insist this forthcoming Test will be like any other game, but a match-winning performance at Durban, his former home ground, would come pretty near the top of his career highlights. Meanwhile, Graeme Smith hopes the emotion gets to him and South Africa can take advantage.

There are a host of stories about Pietersen’s early years growing up in KwaZulu-Natal and almost everyone involved has had their say in the intervening years, especially since Pietersen made his England debut in 2004 and his first return to South Africa in early 2005. But it’s still fascinating to recall that he wasn't expected to crack the big time.

“The only thing that said he would have made it was his very positive and aggressive attitude,” Mike Bechet, his former coach at Martizburg College, told Cricinfo. “With us he was an offspinning allrounder. When he went into club cricket they didn’t want to bowl him much and I think he made a conscious decision to work on his batting. He was always out to prove a point.

“To be able to break through you have to be given a chance. At the point when he left he hadn’t really done enough. There were a host of people who wanted chances. He probably thought he would have an accelerated chance if he went elsewhere.

“He scored hundreds in his club sides, but other guys were doing that too,” Bechet added. “I suppose he looked at the long-term view – at that point in time there were no guarantees for anyone, we were just coming into transformation and no one really knew what the future held.”

Bechet is still in charge of the cricket intake at Martizburg College which also boasts Jonty Rhodes among its alumni. He didn’t receive a very complimentary mention in Pietersen’s autobiography, the batsman feeling he had been held back.

“In my final year at Maritzburg College I was such a late developer that I was still in the second cricket team,” Pietersen wrote, “but I started to excel and was only kept out of the first team because the coach, Mike Bechet, had something against me - or so it seemed to me. It's funny how he now tries to claim me as one of his successes and asks my mum for shirts and things, but I will never have any time for that man.”

Bechet is keen not to rake over old ground, but is disappointed that Pietersen hasn’t made more of an effort. “He’s made his point, he’s told the world why he left South Africa and I think it would be nice if he came back to the college,” he said. “All the guys who have played Springbok rugby or Protea cricket will come back and present a blazer. Kids love heroes.”

	Festive cheer: Makhaya Ntini in high spirits ahead of the Christmas Test © Getty Images

Suitcases, holdalls and cricket coffins. They are all normal pieces of luggage for the modern player. But prams and pushchairs? Even though there is a serious Test starting in three days, this is Christmas and a time for families to be together. It’s not only cricketers who have arrived in Durban.

Both England and South Africa have wives, girlfriends and children in tow. As South Africa arrived at their team hotel on Wednesday morning the mountain of luggage filled the lobby. Pity the poor bellboys who had to lug it to the various rooms.

South Africa are based in the city, just around the corner from the ground, while England are tucked away 15 minutes up the coast in Umhlanga. It’s a similar type of suburb to Sandton in Johannesburg, more relaxed and family-friendly than the rather edgy city centre. There is a new international airport being built to cater for Durban ahead of the football World Cup and it will be located not far from Umhlanga.

England’s colonial-style hotel suits them down to the ground with space for the families to spread out onto the beach or by the pool. Not a bad way to spend Christmas, but the children will have to build sandmen instead of snowmen.

England now have an agreement where they will only spend Christmas away when touring South Africa and Australia. That means this time next year there will be similar scenes in Melbourne as the Ashes series will be in full swing.

That’s where South Africa were 12 months ago and a few days later secured a famous series victory. It was the highlight of Graeme Smith’s career, but he admits it’s nice to back on home soil for this festive season.

“All the families are here with the guys. It’s a fantastic time to play cricket, the Boxing Day and New Year Tests,” Smith said. “Last year we were in Australia so it’s great to be at home this time. I’m sure the crowds will be great and right behind us. Off the field it’s always nice to have the families around and let’s hope everyone has a good time.”

Still, the players are here to win a Test match so there isn’t much time to kick back. England had a fitness session and South Africa hit the nets at Kingsmead. Both teams will net on Christmas Eve and are even due to practice on Christmas Day. Time to get those Santa hats out.

The morning after England’s latest nerve-jangling escape and it’s off to Durban. The big news is that we have arrived on a sunny day. That may sound like an obvious thing to say, and apologies to all those stuck in snowdrifts and shivering back in England, but in recent weeks this city has barely had a full dry day.

Those of the England squad and the following media pack who were here for the one-day series could barely get outside for a week. It was raining when they arrived, rained when they left and the middle bit was full of rain too. The long-range predictions for the Test are brilliant, either. “What’s wrong with the place,” one colleague has kept saying to me.

Maybe that is why I have arrived in KwaZulu-Natal with a less-than-inspired image of Durban (which isn’t the capital, by the way, that’s Pietermaritzburg about 40 minutes away). It’s hard to get a favourable impression of a place when you are stuck indoors, wiling away the hours as the rain hammers down. Especially when there’s meant to be cricket on.

However, I hate to judge a place before I have sampled it for myself so I’m not going to be making any sweeping statements yet. It’s Christmas, after all, the season of goodwill.
Ah, Christmas, so it is. I’m sorry, I know it’s so clichéd and Englishman-overseas to say, but it really doesn’t feel like the festive season. It’s 28 degrees with 90% humidity. I almost didn't notice the big Christmas tree in the lobby of the hotel. Anyone fancy sending a bit of that snow down this way. I can offer you a few degrees and some sunshine by return postage. Darn, no I can’t, the clouds have rolled in again. What is wrong with this place.

***

South African Airways hasn’t had much good publicity of late. Three of their Airlink planes, a smaller branch of the main airline, skidded off the runway in the space of a month and the company was threatened with being pulled out of the skies.

So far, though, I’ve not had any problems getting from A to B (that’s clearly the cue for mayhem on New Year’s Eve when I head to Cape Town) and SAA have been as efficient as any other airline I have flown.

But something amusing caught my eye today as we were preparing for take-off from Johannesburg. The safety video went through all the normal bits about seatbelts, life jackets, oxygen masks and emergency exits before reaching the section about which electronic devices you are allowed to use in flight.

“Once the seatbelt signs are switched off you may use portable razors, laptop computers, games consoles, portable CD and tape players.” Hang on, tape players. Does anyone still own one of those? Even CD players are a bit 1990s. Maybe SAA need to update their inflight video. Or maybe they have more important things to worry about.

	Paul Harris couldn't quite match Graeme Swann in the humour stakes © Getty Images

Last night’s press conferences were like an evening at the comedy club as Graeme Swann, a regular on the stage, and Paul Harris, a more unheralded joker, took it in turns to play up their audience. You wouldn't have guessed it had been a serious day of Test cricket.

It was a double-act between opposition spinners, but there was only one winner. “As soon as we get Harris out first thing in the morning, cause he’s waving like an idiot at the back of the room,” Swann said when discussing England’s plans, "we can concentrate on bowling straight and getting through the proper batsmen.”

Then it was Harris’s turn to face the media, but sadly he couldn’t compete in the laughter stakes. When discussing South Africa’s final-session bowling performance, Harris pointed to the inexperience of the attack.

“We weren’t at our best, we have a pretty young bowling line-up apart from Makhaya who’s played like a billion…” he said, which was proceeded by silence before Harris added. “That was a joke, you can laugh. Sorry, I came in after Swanny.”

Whereas Swann does a good line in confident, cocky humour, Harris takes a more self-deprecating route. “I’ve been working on the straighter ball,” he said of Ian Bell’s dismissal when the England batsman inexplicably shouldered arms, “although some people say that’s all I’ve got.”

Then he couldn’t help but smile when recalling Paul Collingwood’s wicket which came from a ball that spun perfectly. “It was nice to turn one,” he said with a glint in his eye.

The next two days will show who will have the last laugh.

	Graham Onions has never been so hot © Getty Images

It’s hotting up at Centurion. The mercury is nudging 35 degrees (and temperature readings are taken in the shade). Out in the middle it’s sizzling. No wonder England’s bowlers looked cooked after 153 overs in the field.

Conditions made for a sharp contrast from what England experienced for much of the previous two weeks. There was rain in Durban and more rain in East London before the sun finally made an appearance, but down on the coast the heat wasn't nearly as oppressive. All eyes are now on the forecast for the next few days to see if the thunderstorms return.

“I've been to South Africa a few times, so I knew it was going to be hot,” Graham Onions said. "In the build-up to this Test it hasn't been boiling hot, and it's been raining. We all expected it to warm up when the Tests started.”

The weather is certainly far removed from what Onions is normally used to in the north-east of England, where even in the height of summer it’s always wise to have a jumper and raincoat close to hand. “It’s the first Test for me away from home and slightly different conditions than up north,” Onions said.

Maybe, for once, the players won’t have minded jumping into their post-play ice baths.

A by-product of the hot weather has been an increase in the number of insects making an appearance. There’s been a real collection in the last few days, including the wasps that have taken great delight in buzzing around the press box.

It started off with one and then his mates began to arrive, no doubt attracted by the various open drinks cans and their sugary contents. They made for some hasty wafting of match programmes and any other implements to hand, but funnily enough that only seemed to annoy them.

Then when the sun sets a whole manner of weird and wonderful things are on display. Some fly, small crawl and some seem to do both. Fortunately, none seem to bite and I've yet to be stung. So far at least.

	The players emerge as the series begins © Getty Images

So finally the Test series is upon us. It’s felt a long time coming, but that has helped raise anticipation levels. We are starting at Centurion Park (or the name of a certain TV company as it is known by) which is a wonderful stadium for cricket.

It has been able to marry the needs of a modern ground but also retain traditional touches. There is only one stand which covers about a third of the perimeter at the Pavilion End. It houses the changing rooms (with the long staircase to help with players’ fitness) corporate boxes and the media centre.

The press box is open air which is terrific because you get the full atmosphere unlike the hermetically sealed jobs that are springing up around the world. On my previous visit to South Africa, for the World Twenty20 2007, I had the experience of the open-air box at the Wanderers which virtually vibrated to a packed house of India and Pakistan fans during the final.

On this occasion there wasn’t quite the same volume level, although the home supporters certainly made their presence felt when the South Africans came out to bat. It was great to see a strong turnout for the opening day. There has been concern about the numbers coming through the turnstiles but on this occasion the public filled the grass banks that surround the rest of the ground.

It helped that today is a public holiday for Reconciliation Day – created after apartheid ended in 1994 – and plenty of people took the chance to spend a day at the cricket. The Gauteng region certainly hasn’t been short of high-level games this year; the IPL, the Champions Trophy, England’s ODIs and now this Test. Even though the grassed areas were well populated, the empty blue seats in the stand suggested that may be a little too much cricket for some.

Of course, whenever England travel overseas crowds are better because of the large tour groups and Barmy Army. There will be a surge of fans from the UK into Durban next week and Cape Town will be rammed with them in the New Year. It all helps the local economy.

Behind one side of the grass banks are a row of chalet-style buildings which allow for a fairly unique cricket-watching experience. They all have private balconies and certainly make for a civilised day out. Then around the back of the chalets are a whole host of braais and as lunch approached the smell began to waft over the ground. Now that’s a true South African experience.

	Andrew Strauss accepts the BBC Sports Personality Team of the Year award © Getty Images

On Sunday evening after arriving in Johannesburg, the UK media were invited to watch the BBC’s Sports Personality of the Year show at the team hotel as England were recognised for their Ashes victory with the Team of the Year gong.

It was a slightly surreal experience watching the programme through an unbroken feed pumped into a large conference suite. Usually I have watched SPOTY on my sofa at home. This time we got to see the pre-show warm-up and heard the instructions to the audience not to trip over the camera tracks.

The whole squad turned out in their finest Hugo Boss attire while representatives from the British High Commission added their support. The last time the cricket team were such a central part of the awards evening was in 2005 and the time difference wasn’t quite so friendly.

Andrew Flintoff had to get up at 4am in Lahore to receive his Sports Personality of the Year award live on air and the other Ashes winners also made an appearance to collect Team of the Year. There were some bleary-eyed players the next day and suffice to say they lost their ODI against Pakistan.

This time there were no such dramas with a training session scheduled for the morning after, but there was still a fair amount of sitting around for the players as they waited for the show to come live to them in Johannesburg. Andrew Strauss, who was nominated for the top award but couldn’t break into the top three, spoke on behalf of the team but England’s trophy was collected by Flintoff back at the show in Sheffield. When asked what Strauss was like as a captain he said: “He’s alright, isn’t he.”
When the show came live into the hotel you could often hear the director’s talk-back – where he speaks to the presenters through earpieces – and it was eye-opening to hear how quickly they have to work. Then there was the sight of the England players applauding in front of a big screen so that the show could cut back to them for a quick shot.

During one of periods when they weren't needed some players headed off for dinner but a few – including Alastair Cook and James Anderson – stayed around and spent time admiring a replica of the trophy. It is full of great names, but only four cricketers – Jim Laker, David Steele, Ian Botham and Andrew Flintoff. Who will be the next?

	Paul Harris was given a stiff working over by the South African management © Getty Images

I have been in Potchefstroom, the university city about 100kms west of Johannesburg, for three days at the South Africa training camp. Many international teams and sports people make use of the facilities; athletes regularly train here, the Australian cricket team are fond of the location and Spain will base themselves here during the football World Cup next year. A couple of English counties are also planning pre-season trips as well.

As you arrive from Johannesburg, Potch – as it is known – just sort of appears almost out of nowhere. There are few tall buildings to catch the eye and the only clue was a sign in Afrikaans welcoming you to the town. I heard a random fact that it has the highest concentration of churches per head of population in South Africa. Anyone know if that’s true? There were certainly plenty of bells ringing on Sunday morning.

It’s a quiet time of the year at the moment with most education establishments having broken up for the holiday season. Occasionally I would see a truck or jeep laden to overflowing with furniture as students moved out. “We don’t get many tourists at this time year,” a local waitress told me.

Senwes Park itself is a very pleasant cricket ground, almost a mini replica of Centurion Park with large grass banks and little wooden chalets dotted around. The pavilion is an elegant building and includes a range of memorabilia from the North West province’s history. The walls are dotted with shirts from teams who have played or trained here, some with messages of thanks.

However, the main reason I came here after starting the tour in East London was to see how the South Africans were shaping up ahead of the Test series. They were certainly put through some tough training sessions in very warm conditions and it was interesting to see some of the methods they used.

To try and simulate a match situation a centre-wicket net was set up and batsmen would spend about 90 minutes in there as though playing a proper innings. The bowlers ran in hard and the batsmen would rotate the strike with the process continuing for different combinations of players. The rest of the squad were spilt between traditional nets and fielding drills.

Paul Harris was given a real working over by one of the coaches as he had tennis balls fired at him at great speed. To begin with he couldn’t get a hand on them, but by the end he was catching a fair few. Morne Morkel, not the most natural of close catchers, was given some advice from Graeme Smith, but the tall fast bowler is unlikely to find himself in the slips.

Local kids took the chance to fill up their bats and shirts with autographs from their heroes. They were all happy to oblige and were in relaxed spirits. In three days it will be time to get serious.

	Graeme Swann was "gutted" to miss out on his first hat-trick at any level © Getty Images

In the modern game, media training has meant a lot of what players say is clichéd or coach-speak. With many players, you can go into a press conference and know exactly what you'll be playing back on your dictaphone 10 minutes later. “We hit the right areas”, “The guys gave 110%”, “I’ve just got to keep putting in the hard work.” The list goes on.

However, a Graeme Swann press conference is something to savour, so when he took 6 for 55 at Buffalo Park everyone knew they would have some great quotes to fill up their copy. Swann Days are certainly a long way from the legendary Duncan Days of old, when the former England coach used to have to front up to the media (a job he loathed), most notably on the days when his team had performed like a rabble.

Firstly Swann said he was “gutted” at missing his first hat-trick at any level when a delivery bounced over the stumps. “I told Straussy to put everyone round the bat”. He also added that he wanted to play the second two-dayer so he could avoid extra fitness work. "It doesn't really rock my boat," he said.

But the best was still to come as he explained how Matt Prior’s sense of humour earned him his three in four. "The next ball pitched in exactly the same place and hit the stumps,” he said. “The batsman was still laughing because Matt Prior said something funny, bless him. He said there are two things you should never do: cut a spinner and pat a burning dog.”

The first part of Prior’s international career included the jelly-bean incident against India at Trent Bridge, where the wicketkeeper took the blame for a childish prank, although it was unclear if he was the real culprit. He seems to have worked on his sledging since then and it was enough to leave his opposite number, Mangaliso Mosehle, in stitches.

Prior and Swann could make for an interesting, and amusing, combination during the Test series. It will be worth turning up the stump microphones.

***

Kevin Pietersen is the latest face (and hair) of Brylcreem and there was a coincidental link between KP and the original "Brylcreem Boy", Denis Compton, during Thursday’s play in East London.

As Pietersen did a lap of the ground, hair slicked back to make the PRs proud, he walked past the press box. Inside, Patrick Compton, one of Denis’ two sons and now a journalist based in Durban, was sat watching the game. Patrick had a brief, three-match, first-class career with Natal in 1979-80 and is now one of South Africa’s leading cricket writers. His nephew, Nick, has recently moved from Middlesex to Somerset in the English county game.

	East London's sand dunes aren't just a good training aid. They are quite pretty too © Getty Images

In my first dispatch from South Africa I mentioned Michael Henderson’s rather blunt assessment of East London 10 years ago, which made him “the most hated journalist in South Africa,” according to the local Daily Dispatch newspaper at the time.

I admit I arrived in the city with preconceptions, and as the rain fell on my first day – it was torrential during a mighty overnight thunderstorm, which forced a number of flights, including the one carrying Mushtaq Ahmed, to turn around – I could kind of see where Henderson had been coming from. However, after spending a little longer here I am starting to see the place in a different light. It helped no end that the sun came out for a day.

From my hotel in the centre of the older part of town, which does give the feel of stepping back a few decades, it’s a 20-minute walk along the foreshore to Buffalo Park. The waves crash against a rocky coastline as the penguins in the local aquarium sun themselves by their pools. Further along the path, people are selling African souvenirs, and if you carry on, rather than turn inwards towards the ground, you will reach the tall sand dunes that the England players sprinted up during one of their training sessions. There is always something impressive about a harsh coastline with the force of nature in full flow.

Buffalo Park itself is, admittedly, looking a little ramshackle, but the people are friendly and have worked hard to ensure this game could start after a week of bad weather. Half the ground is surrounded by grass banks – an increasingly rare sight these days, as venues are developed to maximise capacity – and the reception proudly displays the history of Border cricket.

One of their finest sons is Makhaya Ntini, who has become a national hero of huge standing and will play his 100th Test at Centurion Park. He hails from the Eastern Cape village of Mdingi, where he was talent-spotted and fast-tracked into the cricket set-up as a beacon of the new South Africa.

And back on the field we have even been treated to the rare sight of cricketers in action. It has been 10 days since England won the fourth ODI in Port Elizabeth and they haven’t been on the park since. And, with apologies to their rare series win in the one-dayers, when Andrew Strauss defended the first ball back to the bowler it signalled the start of the serious leg of this tour.

However, shortly after lunch, ominous dark clouds were encroaching over the ground and soon the thunderstorm arrived. Still, if tomorrow dawns sunny I’ll walk to the ground again – it’s worth it. East London will never be top of the tourist list in South Africa – there is serious competition for that accolade – but it’s certainly not as bad as some would make out.

	Makhaya Ntini and Ethiopian athletics legend Halle Gebreselassie at the red carpet event before the 2010 World Cup final draw © Getty Images

There is only one sporting event dominating South Africa at the moment, and I can confirm it isn’t England’s upcoming two-day matches against an Invitational XI in East London. The country is still abuzz following Friday’s World Cup draw, and as I arrived at Tambo airport in Johannesburg the front pages of the newspapers were reflecting on the excitement of the star-studded event in Cape Town.

“It’s party time” splashed the Sunday Times and pieces inside dissected the event in huge detail, from how the World Cup will boost the tourist industry to what David Beckham had been eating during his whistle-stop trip. Apparently he dined on yellowtail sashimi, Nando’s lemon chicken and ostrich fillet. So now you know.

The last time I was in South Africa, for the 2007 World Twenty20, the countdown clock outside the airport read 1004 days. This time it was down to 186. The airport was also a construction site, but now it is a gleaming, modern terminal ready to deal with the hundreds of thousands who will descend in June. Not long to go.

Before the football, though, there is time for cricket. The one-day series has certainly whetted the appetite for the four-Test series, which starts in Centurion on December 16. England are preparing in East London, a 90-minute flight south from Johannesburg on the rugged south-east coast. It hasn’t got the greatest reputation as a thriving “place to visit” and, in cricket circles, is remembered for a scathing article penned by Michael Henderson on a previous England tour when he basically said he’d rather be anywhere else.

I’ll give it the week before making an assessment, but the weather isn’t playing ball. I pulled back the curtains on my first full day here and could see… precisely nothing. The shoreline that was visible the previous evening was covered in heavy cloud and the next-door building was barely visible. Apparently it rained most of last week and the locals are wondering when summer will arrive.

England were forced to cancel their training session and, instead, hit the gym. After the wet week they had in Durban, the players will be crossing their fingers to get on the park come Wednesday.

****

The exotically named Hanalulu Shuttle Service whisked me from the airport to my hotel. Lulama, the chatty driver, struck me as an industrious person. He is a one-man business and doesn’t restrict himself to picking up bleary-eyed visitors. On the reverse of his business card he lists “Services Offered: General Supplier, Stationery, Catering, Embroidery, Printing and Office Removal.” Sounds like a useful man to know.


****

Most of you will have heard the joke by now. Where do England’s players stay while on tour in South Africa? With their parents. The connections of Kevin Pietersen and Jonathan Trott have been a regular theme during the first month of the tour and it will remain so throughout the next six weeks.

On SuperSport, the pay-TV network, the Test series is being advertised with a range of promos, but one in particular caught my eye. Footage of an England team huddle is dubbed with the local accent and the voiceover at the end goes: “It’s South Africa versus, hmm, England. Starting December 16.” Gotta love the sense of humour.